Listen to a 12 Minute Talk I Gave for Stonecroft Ministries 2020
- Deception: Revelation to Release Response to my Christian Gay Spouse
The shock of a breast cancer diagnosis at 30 years old did not wear off for over two years. Then I had another moment to remember. I asked my husband if he had fallen in love with someone else. A man.
After my second breast cancer diagnosis in my early 40s, I realized I needed control over all I was facing. I finally turned to God.
God sometimes uses hard things to help us acknowledge the good things He gives us.
Discussion Questions for Small Groups
- Deception – A Reality
Can you remember a time you were deceived right now? Did your girlfriends not tell you about a party because they did not invite you? Where there times in school when pop quizzes were announced when they promised no unannounced tests? Deception is routine in our lives. We hear it in the world around us and in media.
We have seen or practiced deception in our relationships, our work and jobs, our sexuality, and in how we view God. But God loves you and he wants to heal the effects of deception and deceit in your life. God wants you to recognize the source, identify the subtle start of cloudy thinking, and begin to integrate yourself completely. God wants us to move to discernment – an understanding of ourselves and of people around us. He wants us to know His word, the Bible and to know Him.
Discussion Questions for Small Groups
- Deception in Sexuality
Deception for some of us is living the lie of marital harmony: Looking good to society, our friends and our church family. Deceitfulness may be the betrayal of our true identity or can be denying relational needs and tolerating unmet expectations. Deception is not uncommon, and there are many reasons for deception between romantic partners.
Do you question whether you are “good enough” to be a child of God? Perhaps you have sexual sin in your life that you have never told anyone? Is there shame and regret in your past? What do we do with all of our sexual questions? Will I look to society and culture to answer the questions?
Will I ask the Holy Spirit within me as a Christ follower to give me understanding? Will I study God’s word for clarity to understand passion, and importance of my sexuality? Will I ask Jesus to come and heal my broken heart in the area of sexuality? How do I move from deception to discernment?
Discussion Questions for Small Groups
- Deception in Relationships
There is the deception that haunts us in difficult relationships. Did your best friend steal your boyfriend, or have an affair with your husband? Perhaps your husband hid money from you, lied about where they were at, and practiced half- truths to avoid a conflict? Did your family members deceive you in some way? Maybe your parents held a secret for years and never told you the truth.
Family dishonesty is heart wrenching, gives critical wounds, and struggle over this type of deceit. We are capable of being wounded the most when we love. When we cannot escape or turn away from the relationship easily, such as parents, immediate family, siblings and cousins we may be wounded over and over. We are to move toward discernment with God’s help.
Discussion Questions for Small Groups
- Deception of Work and Career
It had been a 12-hour day and I was watching the cars whiz by the Galleria in my high-rise office in Dallas. I saw my reflection in the window and stared. My thought was, “Is this all there is?” I had reached the Vice President level at a national company. I was being paid very well. My baby was this job, and I had sacrificed much to be successful. What a shock to ask that question.
Our choices define us. Some things we do not have control over, such as where we were born and who are our parents. But most of our lives we have many choices to make. As you continue on your work or career path, determine what are your goals.
What is your vision? How you work with and for people will create opportunities for you and your career. Planning for every situation is impossible, and many things will not be in your control. You must be wise. You must be real and truthful in your actions. You must learn to be discerning in all areas of your life.
Discussion Questions for Small Groups
- Words Matter, Don’t They?
Why should we write? Why do I write? Words matter whether spoken or written, but written words can be reread and cherished. How many of you write? What do you write? Do you write daily? How often do you stop yourself from writing by saying, “ I don’t have anything to say that someone wants to hear? We write to communicate, describe situations or our lives, to be creative, change the world, to inspire, advise, and document discussions, and last, to be fully alive.
Writing Exercises and Discussion Questions
- Mental Illness
Mental Illness in Debi’s life included diagnosed depression, anxiety and breaking with reality. She also experienced living with a mentally ill person. Debi has experienced deep deception and betrayal, which prompted her to find out why she made certain choices. Her four-time cancer diagnosis led her down dark tunnels and into God’s glorious light of healing.
Discussion Questions for Small Groups
- Walking with God
Hiking and walking in all 50 states and many countries, has given me true experiences to share with scriptures and questions for any walker and hiker to use and discuss individually and with a family or group. When I hike with groups, I take devotions with me to read when we reach our destination. We use questions and discussions based on scriptures.
Discussion Questions for Small Groups
Whether you are new to an area or a native, an experienced or novice hiker, one of the best ways to get to know people and your surroundings is to hike. You may never put on hiking boots, but people like to walk, even if it is around their neighborhood. We see God in nature with people and the Scriptures give us insight into our Creator.